I’m a Mustang freak. I can’t exactly afford any car I want, but I can surely swing $80k for a Viper. But Vipers are ghey so I’m not doing that. Besides, it’s hard for me to justify an $80k car when I work from home and rarely leave the house. Instead I buy Mustangs – Four in the past four years.
So my friend Punkie Barbie calls me up. She’s cute and SPUNKY and always a blast, sober or otherwise. Her car was in the shop and she rented herself a spiffy new Mustang. “Want to go for a ride?” she asks. Sure. She lets me drive (big mistake). I tear out of the parking lot on two wheels, off to the freeway, and head south with no real destination in mind. I feel like a race car driver.
We pull into this rest area and opps – the brakes weren’t nearly as good as my car, and off the ledge we go. Fuck. Thank God it was a rental.
